Friday, August 14, 2015

5 things my kids need to know so they don't mess up their lives

     I have a 15 year old boy starting high school.  To make matters worse, a friend of mine said, "He's the most good looking kid I've ever seen."  Then my wife told me last week, "I think we're about to embark on a wild ride."

     I wish that I could do some things over in my life but even more I wish that my kids would take my advice on a few things.

1. Sex.

     Do NOT get going down this road before you are in a committed relationship AND are prepared (not necessarily ready, but prepared) to have a child.  Having a baby is a game changer.  MTV may make TV shows about teen moms and dads, but it is not worth the risk.

     Aside from pregnancy, all it takes is the wrong sexually transmitted disease and it can stick with you for your whole life.

     Condoms break all the time.  And there is no warning bell to tell you until its too late.  Just wait till you're older.  Please.

2. Alcohol or Drugs.

     There's a difference between having a drink and drinking to get drunk.  Sadly many kids drink to get drunk.  Or do drugs to get high.

     Bad things can happen when you lower your inhibitions.  Things you would love to do normally but your self-control allows you to make the right choices all the sudden become easier to do when drugs or alcohol are involved.

     Unfortunately, the "everyone is doing it" argument is sadly sort of true.  A large percentage of kids these days experiment.  But there are plenty who don't.  Guess what?  You won't regret waiting till you are older to experiment with having a drink.  And drugs are illegal for a reason.

     Every week there is another story about some unknown substance that caused a problem or death in a child who tried a drug.  You really cannot tell what is in the stuff that's out there.  Many times it is very dangerous.  On top of this, you can never tell how your body is going to react to things.

3. Fighting.

     Fighting rarely if ever solves problems.  I know emotions run high but aside from the dangers of fighting (weapons can get involved, injury/death, arrests, etc...) there is a strength MUCH greater than showing aggression, it is self-control.  It is a much greater display or power to hold back from fighting than to do it.

     Fighting often leads to more fighting.  Be the bigger person and let it go.
   
4. Risk taking.

     This encompasses a lot.  From physically dangerous things to the 3 things above.  Learn to override that voice that says, "It's fine, nothing will happen to me".  And weigh the risks.  (What if....)  As a parent we worry so much about you doing things that will "probably" be okay, but might go catastrophically wrong if one little unforseen thing happens.  

     The world can be a fun place without being so dangerous.

5. Realize that your friends will never love and care for you like your family.  Remember that when deciding who to listen to.


     In the story of Adam and Eve, God was the perfect parent and they STILL made a huge wrong choice in the garden.  We are far from perfect parents and so we can't expect you to be perfect either.  When you make mistakes, we will figure it out.  When you fall down, we'll try to help you up.  We've been there, made the mistakes and hope we can save you the trouble.